UGLY, FUNNY LOOKING, CRATER FACE, WEIRD, UNATTRACTIVE, FAT, FLABBY, LAP BAND, GASTRIC BYPASS, FACE LIFTS, BREAST AUGMENTATION,  RHINOPLASTY, BOTOX, FILLERS, COLLAGEN, TANNING, BLEACHING and the list goes on and on. These are common words that hurt and common ways we try to comfort that hurt and pain inflicted by others.

    I felt compelled to write this because I feel we are losing sight on what beauty truly is. We are damaging our minds, bodies and selling our souls trying to fit that certain genre of beauty and all the aspects of it. The real truth is no matter what you look like there will always be aspects of you that will define you as unattractive to someone. The reason is because we are all human and looking for our own perception of what beauty is. By doubting ourselves and our beauty society has planted the mental seed of cosmetic surgery and other physical alterations in our minds. This starts an ugly downward spiral of pain insecurities, jealousy and therapy all in hopes to be beautiful and accepted. I truly hope this makes everyone think and understand that we where all made different and beauty comes from a collection of places within us, not just our physical form!

      When describing a persons beauty the first thing that usually comes to mind is their physical aspects. Everyone wants to look and feel great about themselves, but society has cleverly made many change their thoughts of what beauty truly is. They have many believing if they don’t fit into a certain physical genre then they aren’t attractive. That leads the brain to start thinking that our own perception of beauty is wrong. Many then start falling prey to the thoughts of society, “I have to be THIN to be IN!” This the most popular, but biggest misconception when it comes to beauty! These thoughts often lead to extreme attempts to lose weight at any cost, sometimes causing irreversible damage to the mind and body!

    The first thing that enters most minds when thinking of weight loss is Dieting. Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Slim Fast, Atkins and South Beach are some of the most popular diets out today. Although the results of these diets vary, the thought of being thin and accepted in society drives people to take a chance on these “supposedly” get slim quick products. Through magazines, television and fashion, society has brainwashed most into thinking skinny is the only way to be beautiful. The images portrayed  through these has children starving themselves to fit into the school clicks and to be accepted amongst their peers. With children being so impressionable they will do anything to make themselves popular or accepted. This desire often times grows from childhood into adulthood, with weight loss being battled their entire life. Mentally and physically this does a tremendous amount of damage. It turns insecure children into insecure adults, who often times are diagnosed with such things as anorexia, bulimia, diabetes, heart disease, intestinal problems and the list goes on. You often times never know the damage you are doing to your body until its to late.

      These diets have some believing in the miracle of losing an abundant amount of weight over night. People run to the nearest grocery store, internet or phone to participate in one of the many world wide, society driven, dieting programs. In these cases think of it this way; you didn’t gain it over night and you aren’t going to lose it overnight.

I want everyone to open their minds to what some of the big misconceptions of beauty and weight loss are today:

  1. I’m not thin so, I’m not beautiful!That is a false statement if I ever heard one. People fail to realize size has a lot to do with genetics, health and science. Please keep that in mind when obsessing with your size. Everyone was not made to be small. There are a million reasons that explain why the entire world is not a size 5/6, not to mention being that small does not fit everyone’s body frame. If you are 6’5 you may need more weight then a person 5’9 especially for health reasons. I think people fail to realize being that small is not always healthy! Physical beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and weight loss should depend more on health then physical aspects.
  2. If I don’t eat I will lose weight fast.-Survey says………”WRONG!” That is a HUGE misconception. If you do not eat what happens is your body has no nutrients to live. What takes place next is your metabolism slows down tremendously because your body thinks you are starving. Thousands of years of evolution have programmed your body to use less energy and store more fat during times of famine, and this is what your body will do if you’re not eating enough. When you do decide to eat, your body will store more of those calories as fat, in an effort to conserve resources for survival. You may even begin to lose muscle mass as your body turns to muscle tissue for fuel. It has to do so to keep you physically able to function day to day without passing out and becoming sick. This makes it more hard to lose weight and eventually your body will breakdown and you will become very sick and possibly causing irreversible damage to your organs. Any time your metabolism is affected your weight is affected. Keep that in mind when trying to lose weight. What you should do to maintain an active and well functioning metabolism and lose weight properly is to eat 3 reasonable meals a day with small healthy snacks in between. That keeps the body functioning properly and with exercise aids you in losing weight.
  3. You have to lose an excessive amount of weight to make a difference!-Wrong again! Sometimes it’s the little things that count. The mid section seems to be a big problem for most people. Losing a few inches off your waist line makes a tremendous difference in the size and fit of clothes. Start off small targeting the problem areas first, don’t jump out the gate saying you are going to lose a tremendous amount of weight. Often times we fail to realize that in losing an abundance of weight we sometimes lose the good weight we have or may even like, such as hips, booty and so forth! 🙂
  4. Only women obsess about losing weight and being thin!-That couldn’t be further from the truth. Men also obsess about losing weight. They want to look muscular and toned for the ladies and to compete with the other males in society. They want to be eye candy in society. That is why we have Mr. America competitions and exotic dancers and so forth as entertainment. Men love showing off those 6 packs and the strength they have gained from the gym and on the basketball courts working it out. They obsess about weight just as much as women if not more, they just go about doing it and losing it in different ways.
  5. If I am thin I will be popular.-Popularity has nothing to do with size! What you look like on the outside can easily be dismissed when you don’t have a a strong mental to back it up. Intelligence, personality, charisma, drive, perseverance, good ethics, etc., carries the most weight with being popular. It encourages others to educate themselves and depend on the mind to survive, not just the body! Remember looks fade and then what do you have? Since when is it cool to be gorgeous, but broke? I’ve never known that to be sexy. There is a reason you sometimes see couples and you feel one is not attractive or that they just don’t match, or the ever popular “I know I look better than her; how did she pull him?” That is because they found more then a physical connection and are attractive to each other in there own right. 9 out of 10 times that couple will last the duration while a couple married for the physical aspects ends when the physical aspects fade away.
  6. Plastic Surgery can fix any flaw!In a physical sense that may be true, but very rarely can it fix your mental flaws or scars. Most times when people opt to have reconstructive surgery it comes from somewhere other then self. It often times comes from a certain physical attribute receiving to much negative attention, or it comes from wanting to look like so and so because they get all the attention, or it could possibly come from a mental scar that is put in place at a young age, by being told you are ugly, you look weird, you don’t fit in and so forth. That then urges a person to fix whatever it is that is ridiculed and often times it fixes the outside, but the inside is still left scarred! Think about this, we come out perfect to our parents and in our own eyes until someone else points out what they deem to be an imperfection. Let SELF not SOCIETY judge what is perfect or not with our physical attributes.
  7. Plastic surgery is not addictive!So not true! Often times when you fix one thing you notice it is out of proportion with another body part, starting the downward spiral of trying achieve perfection! It then becomes just as mental as it does physical.

        Life is made up of so many diverse people. We see it in our everyday life of living, working, shopping, etc. We see all the different shapes, sizes and colors and we know that it is ridiculous to spend every waking hour obsessing over weight and beauty, but still do so. Everyone has there own perception of beauty, so where you think you are unattractive, may be where someone thinks you are the most attractive. With that being said focus on being YOU, not societies version of you, but your own version of you! Big you, little you, average you, DO YOU until the wheels fall off! Be YOUR own inspiration and NEVER let what anyone says negative about you outside effect your inside! I don’t care what the old saying says, TRUE BEAUTY is more then skin deep! It comes from the soul and shines throughout! Much Love to all and stay shining!


Start early with saving you and your young ones life!…

Much Love!



10 Reasons Not to Date a Married Man

10 Reasons Not to Date a Married Man – The Huffington Post

To Thine Own Self Be True

Posted: April 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

Society or Self? Since when is it cool to NOT be your own person! Since when is it cool to FOLLOW and not LEAD! When did it become cool to give up ME to be WE! Where do you draw the line between being society driven with the latest fads, social projects, reality t.v. and still holding on to YOU and representing yourself as an individual not a carbon copy of what society deems to be “RIGHT or WRONG!”

Mirror Mirror On The Wall

Posted: April 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

Mirror, Mirror on the wall who’s the fairest of them all? What defines beauty? Is it the make-up that enhances and alters the natural look underneath OR is it when the make-up is stripped away and the natural look shines through flaws and all? We all know that beauty comes from within, but I am speaking of physical beauty. We as women all love a little lipstick, eyeshadow and so forth. We all love slightly enhancing our natural beauty. Also beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but when the eyes are viewing extreme enhancements are they really able to see the true beauty of that person??? An over abundance of make-up and an extreme amount of added hair truly changes the physical appearance of people. My question is, Is it really fair when dating to send the representative (an abundance of enhancements) instead of showing up as ones natural self or is less more?


Posted: November 29, 2010 in Uncategorized

Actions speak louder than words! I can show you better than I can tell you! I don’t believe IT until IT happens! All so true for the most part, but when your actions DON’T speak louder than your words what is it called and what happens next????

My father called it “Selling Wolf Tickets!”, or better explained writing a check your behind can’t cash! In todays society your actions have to speak without words even being spoken! It’s called “SURVIVAL!” It is so easy to talk it, but very few can walk it!

It is very easy to say what you will or won’t do in a situation, but when the situation arrives what ACTION is taken to resolve the problem??? Are you ready to put all your verbal skills to physical actions? That is the crossroads of life, LEADING BY EXAMPLE! Whatever you put into words needs to be put into action, meaning if you say you are going to do something, do it!

By Overcoming and not Succumbing to our past and unhealthy environment shows our children it is possible to NOT become a product of their environment! It IS possible to have an education, a house, a good job, a good spouse, love and all that life has to offer!

I speak of the positive and for the children we are raising that follow in our footsteps! How can we very well tell our children not to do drugs, don’t drink, go to school, get a job, act like you have some since when the parents are smoking weed, drinking Hennessy, have no education, on welfare, and in the streets acting a fool all at their own free will!

The whole point I am making is LEAD BY EXAMPLE, because our children/grandchildren are future!


Posted: October 11, 2010 in Uncategorized

Bad Luck, Sick, Bad Finances, Sad, Depressed, Failed Relationships, Etc. The list could go on forever! By the Laws of Attraction definition you are bringing it all upon yourself!

The Law of Attraction argues that thoughts (both conscious and unconscious) can affect things outside the head, not just through motivation, but by other means………In short if you think it consciously or subconsciously so shall it be!

Let’s first start by saying there is no such thing as bad luck. There is only bad choices and decisions that we make and bad ways that we handle those choices and decisions! You have total control of your life. Think of it this way, everything is MIND OVER MATTER! If you think it, so shall it be!

You attract into your life whatever you focus on and you get back whatever you think about! Energy is a very strong force in Laws of Attraction! Similar energy attracts similar energy. The mind and soul acts like a magnet drawing whatever energy you are putting out right back to you……for example:

Have you been in numerous failed relationships and wondered why you always ATTRACT all the crazies in the world? The key word in this is ATTRACT! Did you ever think maybe its the unstable, subconscious thoughts and energy that may be drawing the crazies to you i.e. Going into it with the preconceived notion that it’s not going to work because none of the rest of them did, or again your subconscious may play on the fact that you come with a past and no one will accept you for it! All that energy be it conscious or unconscious affects each and ever person that is brought into your life! The way to go about it is to first channel your positive energy and think of things that make you happy and all of the positive things you want in a relationship. Channel all the positive things you have to offer in a relationship and don’t let your mind dwell on the past or anything negative that may affect bringing that great person with all those terrific qualities that you deserve into your life!

Your thoughts determine the way you live and how each and every day of your life is carried out! Positive thoughts attract Positive events and Negative thoughts attract Negative events.

Have you ever awakened in the morning and stumped your toe on your dresser or maybe your door frame and the excruciating pain is all you can think about? At that precise moment you have 1 of 2 choices to make:

A: Dwell on the pain, cuss and fuss and let it set your negative energy for the day  OR

B: Chalk it up to being half sleep and disoriented or just clumsy and change your focus to something positive i.e. Be blessed in the fact that you even woke up to stump your toe and let that positive thought set your energy level for the day!

Again you have total control over your life, it’s all about how you think consciously and unconsciously!

If you entertain thoughts of hardships, strife and obstacles,then that is what you will get. If you keep thinking and expecting success, success, success then you will achieve success!

In order for your thought to manifest, you have to repeat them often and add feelings, desire and interest therefore setting your self up for positive happenings to take place in your life!

The Laws of Attraction are used by everyone knowingly and unknowingly mostly unknowingly. The bottom line is if you fill your mind with worries, anxieties, stress and unhappiness like a boomerang that is what will come back to you! If you fill you mind with  positive thoughts, love and happiness, you will get it bak in return!!!

Much Love to All and Stay Positive!

❤ Slim ❤

Chemical or No Chemical? That is the question! How do you wear your hair, natural or chemically altered and what does it mean to you? Are you wearing your natural tresses following that of what you see as all the new rage in society or does the meaning go deeper?  Are your beautiful locks a way of life leading back to your ancestry or a way of saying you are proud of you heritage and you celebrate it everyday by sporting your beautiful natural mane? A lot of society driven people are so quick to jump on the band wagon of any new fad or trend and as it falls off so do they, then off to follow the latest new trend society has set next!   People have a tendency to act first and ask questions later leaving them not fully aware of what they are following or even why. It “Looked Good” on t.v. or on the person walking down the street etc.! Have you took the time to learn the history behind natural hair or your own beautiful tresses besides the fact that it is hair not chemically altered. For many it is not a fad it is  a way of life showing there strength, love and respect for there culture, land and where they come from. To a lot of people natural hair scares them following back to the days when being “Nappy Headed” was shunned upon and considered you an outcast because one didn’t  “Fit In” to societies level of beauty! A lot of us have grown to accept and follow everything society tells us is beautiful instead of looking in the mirror and at our heritage and ancestry! Before going natural do your research and understand within yourself why you are choosing to do so, be it the latest “Fad” in your eyes or not. Know what your hair means to you, natural or otherwise!  To each his/her own in how you choose to wear your tresses. We all come from a place of beauty in it’s own right that is strong, natural, raw and magnificent! Much Love To All!!! ❤